Meditation Retreat 2009 (Part III)

Apology for the late posting of the last part of my meditation retreat sharing as I'm... well...back to my hectic daily schedule=( haha. Luckily the force has not totally diminished=)

Ok, let's continue. The main objective of the retreat is to cultivate the heart and the mind. The mind is an unfathomable and untamed creature but yet, when cultivated, its immerse potential and power can be unleashed. We have heard and seen so many such examples in real life. During the course of my retreat, I've observed how it changed from being wild, emotional and full of mundane defilements to being more subdued and opened. I wrote clearly in my diary (my friend gave me a diary for me prior to the retreat for me to write down each day's events and feelings and it has proved to be an enormous useful gift! Even the sharing abt my retreat is possible cos I can refer back to the diary. I really thank her from the bottom of my heart=)that on one day I was frustrated that I was not able to pen down all the events, feelings and thinkings (4 pages) but in my entry for the next day, I don't feel like writing (less than 1 page). I also observed that my "mood" for meditation changed from very keen to very sian & dull etc. In fact, our mind can change much faster.

We should not be led by the nose by our feelings and defilements as they are impermanent. They are only existent at that moment. But usually we identify with them so much such that we think they are us then and thus the vicious unhappy cycle carries on. Just observe them, be mindful of them and follow the normal schedule that one has decided for oneself. Contemplation is important to understand why it happens too for us to increase in our wisdom.

Let's move on to some light-hearted issues for now. When I arrived at the monastery, there were 2 "adorable" kids there. Abt the age of 8 I believe. They are brothers. I put adorable with open and close inverted commons cos after a while, they are not so "adorable" after all haha. I guess the main thing is as all the people in the monastery is very nice, we'd forgive them easily, including myself initially but after a while, I think this may not be the best way for them to improve. For example, they would not clean up thoroughly after their meals and then ants would gather. I was quite strict with them subsequently and I think the younger brother was not too pleased haha. They also like to disturb an old dog called "Ah-O", apparently cos it is black. The dog is ABSOLUTELY without a temper! The kids would disturb it and try to drag it to other places when it is resting. Still it is as tame and good-natured as ever?!! There are also lotsa squirrels in the monastery. There are a few times in which they are just a few metres from me! Very cute=)

One last point abt my retreat before I finally end it. Finally! The first time I successfully complete a retreat blogging! Yoo Hoo!!! It is regarding my walking meditation. I din realise it until later into the retreat. I always use walking meditation as "relaxed" time. I mean after one hr of sitting in which my whole body would be aching (esp my legs being in great pain or numb). Walking meditation serves to act as exercise to bring back the blood circulation. This is wrong! As such, my walking mediation has not improved through the years. Well, I'm glad I realise it.

I really look forward to the next retreat but for now, it's show time in the mundane world!;P